The Poetry of Knowing

Our home when we moved in was an almost brand new house in the middle of a hay field. The tall field grass brushed against the newly painted siding. The previous owners horse had chewed some of the boards on the back deck. The back of the house looked onto a tangled mess of Blackberry vines, overgrown Apple trees. At first we barely went back there, it was so difficult to move around. A sense of exploration into a wild place came over me when I began to climb through it all. But, evidence that it had once been a working Apple Orchard was obvious the more I visited. So, bit by bit my work to make a home in the country began. I dove into to the task of creating an idyllic nest and push back the Wild. The property was a blank canvas and I attacked it with virtually non-stop effort. Now, I’m getting to a point where I look around and begin to see the results and its shocking. I mean, I was so into the creation, with my head down to the effort, that now as I walk around with the Dogs, I’m being greeted every moment with a reward, a gift as opposed to another thing to add to my work list. It’s been a real struggle in so many ways over the last few years to live, to survive. But, the land and the work to do, steered me clear of an overwhelming feeling of doubt, anxiety and fear. I’m learning to Detatch, to disconnect from things I can’t control. I guess living close to nature, amongst other living things teaches you that. Animals have the gift of knowing exactly who they are and why they are here. With that knowledge and sense of they display Grace…It’s comforting being around creatures that display the poetry of knowing. Every so often you encounter a human that displays this and it’s inspiring. I guess that’s why we are so drawn to celebrities and sports figures. When they are doing what they do best it’s powerful to watch. They make living look so damn easy. When I started to paint, by necessity but not consciously I had to find work that would allow me an exit if my Art took off, or so I thought. For years, I worked by myself sawing wood, remodelling peoples houses, painting at night after looking after my family. The solitude was very beneficial and was not unlike clearing the weeds, pruning and clearing the vines of my property. I was clearing my inner landscape. I was gaining confidence in myself and my abilities to be a good human being. I have a ways to go, but my goal is to be like the Owls, Coyotes and Hawks I see everyday, there in the present and safe in the knowing of who they are and what that have to do. As the New Year approaches, I resolve to live even more true to myself and my life’s purpose…I Know!